As a parent, one of your biggest goals is preparing your child to eventually set out on their own to “leave the nest” and start their life. Whether they’re heading off to college, starting a career, or moving out to get married, it’s easy to feel a lot of conflicting emotions when you finally become an empty nester.
While you’re undoubtedly proud of your adult child and excited for their next chapter, there’s also no denying the sadness it can bring.
Thankfully, you don’t have to feel stuck in that sadness forever. While it’s okay to miss your child and the way things were, there are things you can do to cope with the impact of an empty nest and start a new chapter in your life. Let’s cover some strategies that can help.
Don’t Ignore Your Emotions
You might feel like you have to hold it all together when your child leaves home. But, it’s a type of grief, and it shouldn’t be ignored. Give yourself time to process those feelings.
Whether you’re sad, lonely, or feel like you’ve lost something important, working through your feelings is often the best way to start healing.
Stay Connected
You might want to call your child every five minutes to check in, and while that’s not necessarily advised, it is a good idea for both of you to stay connected. Today’s technology makes that easier than ever. Set up regular phone calls. Check-in via text. It’s important to give them space and independence, but you certainly don’t have to completely cut off communication.
Speaking of staying connected, this is also a great time to reconnect with your partner or spouse. If you’ve spent the last 18 years putting your child first, now is a great time to rekindle your partnership and consider what you want it to look like from now on. Schedule date nights. Travel together. Spend more time getting to know each other at this stage of life.
Discover Old and New Hobbies
You might have put some of your interests on hold as you raised your child. While that can leave you feeling uncertain now, it provides a great opportunity to rekindle old passions and hobbies. Or, consider finding something new that interests you.
Your child is going out into the world to discover who they are. But, you have an opportunity to discover who you are and who you want to be, too. Consider taking a class, joining groups or events, or doing research on things you’ve always wanted to try. Not only will hobbies keep you focused and occupied, but they can provide you with something to look forward to and a new identity that goes beyond “parent.”
Take Time for Self-Care
Self-care is important for everyone, especially when you’re going through a life change. It also looks different for everyone. So, find small ways of incorporating self-care into your daily routine.
Prioritize sleep each night. Eat nutritious meals. Exercise every day. Keep a gratitude journal. All of these things are self-care practices that can keep stress and sadness at bay and help you adjust to life as an empty nester.
Talk to Someone
Leaning on your partner, friends, and family for support is essential, especially if you’re struggling. But, if you feel like your grief is too much to handle, don’t hesitate to work with a professional.
Being able to talk through your feelings with a mental health professional can make a big difference. You’ll learn how to process them more effectively so you can take positive steps forward on your healing journey. If you’re ready to take that next step, contact me today for a consultation for parenting therapy.